A Believing Man does not Hate a Believing Woman
The statement of the Prophet - صلى الله عليه وسلم -:
“A believing man does not hate a believing woman, if he hates a particular thing in her, he is pleased with another.”
Ibn ‘Uthaymeen states in Sharh Riyaad as Saaliheen
This means that a believing man does not hate a believing woman all together because of her mannerisms. If he hates one particular mannerism, he is pleased with another. For example; if she replied to you badly once, she treated you well a lot of other times, or if she was unkind to you one night, then she was kind to you many nights, if she treated the children badly once, she treated them well a lot of the time and so on.
So if your wife treats you unkindly, do not only look at this one present circumstance, but look at the past and look at the future and judge with justice.
What the Messenger of Allaah - صلى الله عليه وسلم - mentioned here concerning women should also be carried out concerning others whom you have a relationship or friendship with. If a person is unkind to you one time, do not forget his kindness to you [at other times], and compare between the two, if he shows kindness to you more than unkindness, then judge him to be kind. If he is unkind to you more than he is kind, then look and see if he is deserving of forgiveness and forgive him, and whoever forgives and rectifies, then his reward is with Allaah. If he is not deserving of forgiveness, then you may take your rights and you are not blameworthy for doing so, but look into what is more beneficial.
The point is that a person must treat those he has a relationship with, whether it is his wife, friend or someone he is trading with or otherwise, he must treat them justly. If he dislikes one particular thing, or that particular person treats him unkindly, he must look at the issue through other angles, where that person dealt with him kindly [at other times], indeed this is the justness that Allaah ordered His Messenger with in his saying:
Verily, Allaah enjoins justice, beneficence, giving (help) to kith and kin and forbids all evil deeds, prohibitions and oppression. He admonishes you, that you may take heed. } [An Nahl:90]
mentions in Useful Methods for a Life of Content
In this Hadeeth are two tremendous benefits:
The first: The instructions on how to treat your wife, family relations, friends, workers and all acquaintances. You must get used to the fact that each one of them will have faults or deficiencies or something you dislike. When you find this, compare it to what is obligated upon you, or what is befitting for you in keeping a close relationship with them and sustaining a loving relationship; by remembering the good that the person has in them as well as the personal and general objectives.
By disregarding the faults and remembering and focusing on the good, the companionship and relationship between you would be lasting, and you would be content.
The Second: Removing anxiety and stress, maintaining serenity, prolonging the establishment of both obligatory and recommended rights and achieving contentment between both parties. Whoever does not act upon the advice of the Messenger, and acts in the opposite manner by noticing the errors and turning a blind eye to the good, then there is no doubt that he would be stressed, there is no doubt that he would be upset with whoever he has a loving relationship with, and lose a lot of the rights that the both of them should be preserving.